Don't identify with what you see. What you see is an illusion. To the extent you've let the external world shape your identity, it's flawed.
True identity is independent of anything external. It's
Defined as 'a close similarity or affinity,' or 'the fact of being who or what a person or thing is.' The problem when we identify is that we make major assumptions to determine similarities.
To identify with something or someone is to attempt to compare apples to oranges. The only similarities are in our mind and mostly an illusion.
We identify because we want to make sense of something. Consider being selectively ignorant. It's ok not to know - and there's far more about the world we'll never know. By letting go of the need to know, you will get closer to the truth.
In a way, I believe we are conditioned to identify with our faults and limitations. What if you dropped all those false identifications and unassociated from them?
We know that we need to distance ourself from toxic people, so why not distance ourself from our own toxic thoughts?